Still, I Look

By: Nathan Fletcher

Luke 15:20 “…but when he was still a great way off….his father saw him…”

 

Sometimes faith is looking still,

Out the window, on the hill,

When what you long for’s far away…

No promise that it comes today.

No whisper back, no open door,

No proof they’ll walk that path once more.

But still… you look.

And still… you stay.

You dare to hope. You choose to pray.

You’re never a fool to want the best,

To dream of peace, to crave some rest.

But what if healing doesn’t come?

And if the lost stays lost?

What if the prodigal stays numb?

Will you kneel and consider the costs?

What if the answer’s always “no,”

And you are left with letting go?

I’ve learned…this life won’t hand out much:

No guarantees to bank or clutch.

Except that death will surely find,

And grace still meets the fractured mind.

And Christ, who bled, who wore our skin,

Invites us to be whole again.

Forgiveness flows though wounds still burn.

We live. We lose. We grieve. We learn.

We exercise. We eat and sleep.

Yet watch the faithful buried deep.

The man who smoked lives past his prime,

While saints fall early, out of time.

The rich man falls. The child departs.

And who can mend the broken hearts?

Like Job, who lost it all in flame,

His cattle, health, his child, his name…

He wept in ash, with heaven closed,

But still he said… “Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him.”

…And the fire rose.

So still I look, though skies are black.

Still I hope when hope looks back.

Still I ache, and still I rise…

With bloodshot faith and battle cries.

I’ve made my peace with what won’t heal,

But not with quitting what is real.

God never gave up chasing me.

So I won’t stop until I’m free.

If this is how the story goes…

With aching steps and heavy blows,

Then I will stand, though sore and worn,

A child of grief, of grace, reborn.

I’ll show up for the one I am,

Still breathing in the great “I Am.”

And if no rescue ever comes,

Then still… I…will…march. I will not run.

For I believe, despite the night,

There’s still a dawn beyond this fight.

So even if I never see

The ending I had dreamed for me…

I’ll lift my head. I’ll draw my sword.

I’ll write new chapters with the Lord.

And out that window, I will stare,

Not for a sign, but just to care.

To love this life, though torn apart…

To rise with fire in my heart.